Episode #459: Mark Raffan

Welcome back to the Sales Reinvented podcast! In this episode, I’m joined by globally recognized negotiation expert Mark Raffan, founder of Negotiations Ninja and author of “Nine Secrets to Win Deals and Influence Stakeholders.” Mark is known for his straightforward, actionable insights that drive real results. 

Our conversation unravels the often-misunderstood differences between negotiation strategy and tactics and explores how they can work together to produce winning outcomes in high-stakes deals. Mark shares his tried-and-tested techniques for planning, stakeholder mapping, and using both collaborative and competitive approaches. He also reveals his top negotiation dos and don’ts and provides a great real-world example of turning a stalled deal into a win through smart strategy and tactical moves.

To learn more about how to better prepare for complex negotiations and counter aggressive buyer tactics, tune into this episode—it’s packed with the kind of practical advice you won’t want to miss.

Outline of This Episode

• [05:38] Stay silent after asking a question in negotiations for effective results, wait for the counterparty to respond without interjecting
• [07:33] Ask for specific returns, avoid open-ended requests, and clarify what happens if your request is denied
• [12:19] Explore various negotiation strategies and adapt them to each situation for the best outcome
• [16:26] Take-it-or-leave-it offers are often bluffs to hasten negotiation—respond by exploring flexibility calmly
• [17:28] Walk away if negotiation needs aren’t met; slow down when facing last-minute demands
• [20:43] Mark’s top dos and don’ts in negotiations
• [24:00] Reviving a stalled $500K deal strategy

Negotiation Strategy vs. Tactics

Mark sets the stage by making a critical distinction at the start: negotiation strategy is your overarching game plan, while tactics are the specific moves you make to get from point A to point B. Imagine setting sail; your route, preparation, and destination are your strategy, while the course corrections and adjustments you make en route are your tactics.

Negotiators often conflate the two, winging it with a handful of tactics and no defined destination. Mark’s advice is to know what you want before you even enter the room, or risk negotiating with nothing concrete to ask for or offer.

Planning for High-Stakes Deals

Mark underscores the vital role of planning in negotiation success: “80% of success is in the prep.” This isn’t about just showing up with instincts and hoping for the best—real value is discovered in understanding both your levers and those of every stakeholder involved.

Stakeholder mapping and leverage analysis are the bread and butter of Mark’s approach. Many sales professionals make the mistake of only engaging with procurement, assuming that price and delivery are the be-all and end-all. In reality, multiple stakeholders shape a deal, and understanding their unique concerns opens new avenues to add value and find leverage.

Shockingly, Mark sees less than 20% of negotiators (maybe even less than 10% in sales) invest the necessary effort in planning. Those who skip prep and rely solely on talent or instinct often fail under pressure.

Three Game-Changers for Challenging Negotiations

When it comes to effective negotiation tactics, Mark shares his top three:

• Strategic Silence:

After posing a question, resist the urge to fill the void. Silence gives the other party space to reveal more information—and sometimes their true position. It’s a sign of respect and a tool for deeper discovery. Mark recommends holding your tongue as long as it takes, even if the silence feels uncomfortable.

• Conditional Giving:

Never concede without getting something in return. If someone asks for a discount, don’t just agree. Make the concession conditional and specific—“I might be able to do that, if you can X.” Avoid open-ended or vague counteroffers.

• The “What If I Say No?” Test:

To clarify the other side’s fallback plan (and your own), gently ask, “What will you do if I say no?” This can unblock negotiations and uncover true deal breakers, bringing clarity to tough conversations.

Flexing Between Approaches

In complex sales scenarios, Mark recommends reading broadly and flexibly applying lessons drawn from various schools of negotiation thought. Whether it’s Harvard’s collaborative “win-win,” a competitive strategy, or a hybrid approach, sticking rigidly to one philosophy is a mistake.

Use whatever is best suited for the situation that you’re in, and be willing to flex. If the situation or negotiation style of the other party changes, so should your approach. The most effective negotiators are those who can pivot between collaboration and competition as needed.

Handling Aggressive Buyer Tactics

Sales professionals often face aggressive techniques—take-it-or-leave-it ultimatums, last-minute demands (nibbles), or attempts to rush. Mark’s advice: don’t get flustered or succumb to urgency. Most “take it or leave it” situations are bluffs; calmly acknowledge and probe for flexibility. If a nibble appears just as you’re about to close, slow the process down and, if you make a concession, always ask for something in return. Otherwise, you’re inviting further nibbles and training buyers to keep pushing limits.

Resources & People Mentioned

• You Can Negotiate Anything by Herb Cohen
• Camp Negotiations
• Win-Win = Lose-Lose according to Allan Tsang, Negotiations Ninja Podcast Ep #207  
• Harvard Negotiation Programs  

Connect with Mark Raffan

• Mark Raffan on LinkedIn
• Negotiations Ninja 

Connect With Paul Watts

• LinkedIn
• Twitter

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Learn More About Mark Raffan

What was a pivotal moment in your career that shaped your approach to negotiation, and how did it influence your strategy and tactics?

• Early in my career, I ruined many negotiations because I overused charm, was too aggressive, and underused preparation. I realized that bullying isn’t leverage. Strategy is.

Can you share a specific negotiation tactic that has consistently helped you close deals more effectively? Please provide an example where it worked.

• “Conditional Giving”: Never give without getting.
• Example: A client pushed back hard on price. I didn’t discount and instead, I said, “If I bring the team in two weeks early, can we agree to the full scope at this price?”
• They agreed. I kept margin, gave perceived value, and closed faster.
• This tactic shifts focus from cost to value and makes you look flexible without losing ground.

What is the most challenging negotiation you’ve ever faced, and what strategy or tactic helped you turn it into a win?

• One of the toughest negotiations I faced was actually as a procurement lead, negotiating with a large, long-time vendor. I let my ego get ahead of me. I was focused on “winning” the deal instead of protecting the relationship. I pushed too hard, too fast, and nearly blew up a partnership that had taken over a decade to build. What turned it around was humility and a pivot in strategy. I paused the negotiation, picked up the phone, and owned my approach. I reframed the conversation from adversarial to appreciative: “Let’s find a way forward that works for both of us and honors the relationship.” That moment taught me a core truth: great negotiators protect the deal and the relationship, and sometimes, the best tactic is setting your pride aside.

What are your top three must-have tools, frameworks, or resources that sales professionals should use to improve their negotiation skills?

• Success Driver Mapping (from 9 Secrets to Win Deals and Influence Stakeholders) – This helps you know exactly what levers to pull to help you achieve what you want.
• Concession Planning (from 9 Secrets to Win Deals and Influence Stakeholders)- Too many reps wing this. Know in advance what you’re willing to give, what you need in return, and in what order. It keeps you in control when the pressure hits.
• Stakeholder Mapping  (from 9 Secrets to Win Deals and Influence Stakeholders) – Every complex deal has multiple decision-makers. This tool helps you understand who has influence, who has authority, and who can kill the deal silently.

With buyer behaviors evolving and AI playing a larger role in sales, how do you see negotiation strategies and tactics changing in the future? What should sales professionals do to stay ahead?

• AI will automate fact exchange. What’s left? Trust, framing, and nuance.
• To stay ahead: Master emotional intelligence + business acumen.
• Practice in AI roleplay sims (easy to build in ChatGPT)
• Study how top negotiators shape perception, not just price.

What are some simple but powerful negotiation tactics that most salespeople overlook?

• Strategic silence: Say less. Let discomfort do the work. Most salespeople over-talk

Connect with Mark Raffan

Mark Raffan LinkedIn URL – https://www.linkedin.com/in/markraffan/

Mark Raffan X URL – https://x.com/MarkRaffan